Bern's Steak House

At last, COVID is beginning to loosen its grip on us, we’re becoming stronger in our battle against it, and life dawns into normalcy once again. And just in time for my month-long birthday celebration. With this visit to Bern’s, we’re making up for a failed attempt last year as we went into the throes of the pandemic lockdown. A reservation for Bern's Steak House is not easy to come by, three months advance planning being the norm. However, as doors begin to reopen, a weekday slot is more achievable, so on this Tuesday, the first day of June 2021, we entered this much-loved and much-talked about restaurant.

    The atmosphere is rich, to say the least. Everything about the service and the surroundings is elegant and classic, especially the dessert room, which we will explore later. I want to, but I just don't like the decor in the main dining floor. The red velvet walls are covered with classic paintings, niches are homes to busts that could be Roman, Greek, Victorian, Edwardian, you name it. The furniture in the entrance leans toward Louis XXIV Rococo. Nonetheless, once you sit down and service begins, you're willing to forgive, or perhaps forget, the interior design style.

    I regret to say that John and I are not wine connoisseurs, but if you are, you MUST watch the video about their world famous wine cellar on Bern's website. I've never seen anything like it! Instead of wine, John added a new craft beer to his collection, Chimay from Belgium, and I inhaled the Flower Sour, a glorious mixture of vodka, St. Elder, Orgeat syryup, and fresh lemon juice.

    We began our adventure with a subtle onion soup topped with a melt of fontina, provolone, and parmesan cheeses, followed by a bright mixed salad, both unremarkable but satisfying. Then, the main courses arrived. John had a 14-ounce Delmonico steak, cooked medium rare though he asked for medium, but he gushed over it. He waxed lyrical about the flavor and said he wanted to return on a yearly basis just from tasting the steak. I assure you nothing else that followed would have prompted such a reaction. Besides the soup and salad, the steak dinner included a baked potato with all its paraphernalia, onion rings, and the vegetable of the evening, sauteed green beans and mushrooms. They feed you at Bern's, no question.

    I thought I'd sample one of the other entrees sanz beef, so I opted for the Goat Cheese and Portobello Ravioli which came with sauteed Catalan Spinach, all in a sublime sauce of oven dried tomatoes, golden raisins, and pine nuts. The ravioli were not spectacular, but flavorful nonetheless. That dish also included the soup and salad, and a side dish, which I chose to be the baked potato so I could take it home for John.

    Now, to be honest, the reason I wanted to come to Bern's and share this unique experience was their internationally famous "dessert room". Besides a significant list of specialty coffees and drinks, some of the delights offered include Baked Alaska, Twelve Layer Chocolate Cake, Espresso Brownie, Roasted Pineapple Cake, gluten-Vintage Chocolate Lush Sundae, and Brazilian Snow, Bern's original vanilla ice cream infused with freshly ground espresso. A wide variety of sorbets are also available. Many people, myself included, expected a room with desserts on display. That is a misconception. The reality is better, the second floor of the building, decorated in ultra-modern blacks and metallics, is dedicated exclusively to the dessert experience. In fact, to gain access, your server downstairs must make a reservation for you while you enjoy your meal, and you get a separate bill. So, my conclusion is that should I want to, I could just make a reservation for the second floor and bypass the meal altogether. However, my meat-loving husband will have none of that. We shared the Chocolate Peanut Butter Truffle with banana caramel ice cream and the Strawberry Key Lime Tart with graham cracker ice cream, this last element being particularly memorable.

    So many things to explore in Bern's menus (yes, plural) beg for repeat visits. The cheeses, the sauces, MORE desserts, and another Flower Sour are in my future, surely. This is not just another meal at a fancy restaurant, it's a full epicurean adventure for which you need to meditate and prepare yourself mentally and physically to enjoy fully. Leave behind the diet guilt, and skip a couple of meals before you go so you can "feel the Bern's" in all its splendor.

BBFree ©2021

    

RedLander Restaurant

This restaurant is part of Schnebly Winery's expansion, and bringing sophisticated dining into the wine tasting experience was an astute decision. I'd never been to the winery in spite of all the recommendations and the fact that it's in Homestead, Florida, just 45 minutes south of home.

     I'm glad I waited. Originally, people came for the wine tastings. If you wanted solids, you could bring some food from outside or buy the overpriced snacks at their retail counter, and enjoy a pleasant time sipping away in their ample outdoor area. An ersatz grassy lawn contains countless picnic tables for family fun and huge tiki huts with more seating and dim lighting for the romantics, all with a lush tropical background adorned by a quaint bridge over a serpentine koi pond.

     

    Besides the restaurant, Schnebly also added a brewery. In other words, if you didn't visit because of the absence of food or because you're not a wine lover, you are now out of excuses. I sampled the guava wine as a preamble to Schnebly's famous lychee wine, the only wine I cared to consume. The guava flavor stood up bravely to the powerful wine. Now I waited with excited anticipation for my lychee wine. It didn't disappoint. Again, the wine was robust, but the lychee flavor mixed smoothly.

 

     I always expect to find kinks that need to be worked out when a new establishment opens, and at the time of my visit, RedLander had some decisions to make regarding when their lunch hours ended and dinner began, but the food was solid and the service attentive. In my book, that's what counts. And I'm sure their scheduling has been sorted by now.
    

     To begin with, they have a prix fixe menu, which is always merciful on the wallet, and it allows me to sample many different items. John ordered the potato and vegetable soup and I the ceviche for appetizers. The soup was hearty, thick, and flavorful. The ceviche was tangy and fresh.

     For entrees, John ordered the pasta with shrimp and guava tomato sauce and I the Pork and Grits. Hubby was scared about the guava. He was poised and ready to dislike it. I assured him that the guava would do nothing more than add a layer of sweetness to the sauce, but I'm not often successful in mitigating his misgivings. He doesn't say it, but I know he thinks my bold experimentation with food is just plain weird. Nevertheless, I was right. His plate was generous, the shrimp plump and well cooked, and the sauce well executed. One objection he did voice was that he kept finding guava seeds in the sauce that he refused to eat. I can respect that. Perhaps they should've used a seedless guava jam to mix with the marinara.

     My pork was savory and melted in my mouth. It coupled beautifully with the grits, also luscious and flavorful. Both elements lived blissfully in a black bean sauce, a happy surprise since I missed it when I read the menu.

      The freedom that comes with a prix fixe menu allowed me a taste of all dessert choices on the concise menu guilt-free. Today we had Guava Flan Brulee and the Flourless Chocolate Torte. Flan is tricky for me because I happen to have a recipe that beats anything I've ever had in a restaurant, but I'm always hopeful. This one was no different than the rest. The guava syrup was a delightful addition, but the texture was not firm enough for my taste. The chocolate torte was a pleasant discovery. It was more like an over-sized chocolate truffle- rich, powerful, and so dense, it coated every corner of my mouth.
     I'm glad I finally made it to the winery, and inadvertently, my delay turned out to be strategic. If I had gone just to sample wine with no chance of a dining experience, I fear I would've found it all pointless. As it stands, I look forward to another visit.

BB Free ©2016

Yard House

130 different varieties of beer course through gargantuan metal veins hanging from the roof. They all lead to a beer estuary, a  keg room at the far wall of the space, dimly lit with foggy red lights and barely visible through opaque glass. These are the most distinctive elements of the decor at Yard House in Coral Gables, Florida.

     The rest consists of oversized wood booths with severe black seating that dramatically contrasts the metal on the roof  and the nebulous keg room. I asked if I could take a picture inside the mysterious chamber, and suddenly troops of servers seemed to mobilize as if I had given a secret code. The manager, a friendly man by the name of Shane, knelt beside me and in furtive tones explained why he couldn't let me in this impenetrable room. He talked about little black boxes with blinking blue strobe lights, all part of a 'proprietary' system to keep the beer pure and sanitary. It all sounded very clandestine, as if I needed security clearance just to hear it all. Basically, I understood "we invented this system, it's classified, and if we tell you anymore, we'll have to kill you." And I don't even drink beer!
     John, however, does like experimenting with hop juice, and this time he chose the Lost Coast Tangerine Wheat which they served with two orange wedges on the side. I guess they're supposed to enhance the tangerine flavor. After squeezing the juice of both wedges, I asked him if he detected the citrus and he said there was "something there." Hmm... I don't know what that means.
     I ordered the sweetest cocktail on the menu, the Malibu Peach, a mixture of rum, vodka, and island punch. I wondered where the 'peach' would come from, but there it was mixed in the punch, the delicate nectar to complete my confection in a martini glass.
     Besides the covert mission adventure, other things made this meal enjoyable. The menu is extensive and varied. John and I picked items from the Snacks and Appetizers sections, and the portions were the most generous I've ever seen for starter dishes.We even had enough to take home! John ordered the sliders, and four chubby sandwiches came with a hill of shoestring fries. This is an appetizer? I ordered the crispy Brussels sprouts and the chicken strips. Now, everyone would eat their veggies if they were always served like this- crispy, tangy, served with roasted potatoes over a malt vinegar aioli. The chicken strips were standard issue and also arrived in the company of a mound of shoestring fries. However, they also came with a captivating maple mustard dipping sauce. Without a doubt, mustard's romance with maple syrup is sweeter and happier than its traditional relationship with honey.
     You can't help feeling content when you're fed so generously even if the dishes aren't spectacular, and contentment leads to dessert. I love when I see a dessert sampler option on the menu because it means I can get a real taste for what that particular kitchen does with sweets. The Mini Trio Sampler included a chocolate soufflé cake, a peach apple cobbler, and a lemon soufflé cake. The lemon cake was the only disappointment. Lemon desserts should go "Bam!" in your mouth with the perfect balance of sweet and citrus.You really had to search deep for any hint of lemon in this version.The chocolate soufflé cake was rich and pillowy. Surprisingly, I thought the headliner was the peach apple cobbler. I don't care much for apple desserts, but this one was luscious in its sweetness, the peach adding an extra layer of flavor, the crunchy sugar of the crumble topping remaining in your mouth as a souvenir.

     Maybe not every dish wows, but the menu contains a little bit of everything, and many offerings, although commonplace in most American fare menus, have whimsical elements that set them apart. No matter what you order, though, you won't go hungry at Yard House.

BB Free ©2015